Phase 3 Thoughts or Life Update Summer 2015

Oh hey again!

So I'm going to provide an update for the summer by talking about Phase 3.

I'll be answering questions like....What's going to happen in Phase 3? Is there a Phase 3 yet? 

Wait...what? Are we already at Phase 3? What the hell am I talking about?

Let's go back.

I've spoken on Phase 2, this contrived arc of goals I created after graduating from undergrad. These goals are part of a larger compilation that I refer to as the 30 List, which almost has a dogmatic possession of my life.

So what was Phase 1? Phase 1 was basically about me constructing the path I should take after the chaos of graduation. It involved exploring the public service (education, library science) interest I've always had, honing in on my writing skills, figuring out what grad school degree to earn, and taking my trip abroad. 

Phase 2 was about working on my grad school degree, taking on more travels (though more relegated to North America), getting my film/writing career underway, and moving out. As I've chronicled in my various posts, I've more or less completed these tasks. 

My short film Awake was shown at the Chattanooga Film Festival, which really had first rate shorts and features and was a blast to attend. I'm working on another short script entitled Skinny Dipping that I plan to make after the summer. So far the script has been receiving positive remarks, but it needs a little more (I'm hoping for two more drafts this summer). 

I traveled to Quebec so I took Canada off my 30 List. Unfortunately Operation Grand Canyon was held on the ground due to finances. That being said, it's still in my sights and I was able to take care of two, non-list, travel goals by going to San Francisco and D.C. last year, plus I just finished camping at Cumberland Island which was another travel goal of mine.

Last week I just finished my last real semester of grad school. This summer I will take one more class and I will have one class credit be my internship with the Law Library. So by August I'll be finished with my Master's. 

And finally, the moving out is happening. As I mentioned in the afore-linked (is that a word? It is now) Phase 2 post, one of my goals was to move out of the state of Georgia to gain perspective. Generally, I like Georgia, at least North Georgia. I consider it home but I refrain from settling down until I've lived somewhere else. As part of this internship I'll be living in Columbia, SC, which has an urban enough setting to step out of the rural elements I'm accustomed to. 

So what about Phase 3? 

I mean does it exist enough to even warrant a boldface type much less a blog post?

Yes...and no...

If I follow the 30 List I can discern what Phase 3 is about. Phase 3 is largely a continuation of the work I've put in. At the same time, the goals of Phase 3 are less definable in tangible terms.

There are roughly 3 defined goals that are a part of Phase 3. One is to get something of my creation shown in a large way. As a filmmaker, this means having a short film shown at a major film festival. Like what? Like Sundance, Cannes, Toronto, Berlin, or Venice. Sounds big? I know!! I'm still a way from that, but having Awake shown at Chattanooga and the positive feedback it has received gives me a reasonable amount of confidence to move forward. 

Second to this is finding a place to settle down.

Third is, of course, continuing to follow through with my travel goals. There remains several left and I'm starting to float with the idea of wild cards or I.O.U.'s. As I travel and age more destinations become attractive than what I initially put. Brazil or Tanzania? India or Turkey? Nicaragua or Cuba? So as I'm getting older the list as a set of rules is subsuming the idea of the list being guidelines. I realized this difficulty as I placed Egypt on my list without realizing how unstable the nation would become. 

But here's the real reason I'm starting to see flexibility in my travel plans: I'm tired of traveling alone.

Now, my solo travels aren't necessarily a bad thing. There are positives in certain elements, such as having my own individualized itinerary, using the transportation and accommodations I prefer, etc. Plus traveling alone has done more for getting me out of my shell than anything else simply because I have to talk to people. 

The negatives are starting to outweigh the positives, however. As I mentioned in my Quebec post my travels are being mired in bouts of loneliness. Whether friends or lady-friends I want to be able to share my travel experiences with people. I think a lot of individuals before my college graduation would pin me as an introvert but the truth is that I'm more of an ambivert (just one that was and remains socially awkward). Recently I camped out at Cumberland Island and I truly relished it, but I certainly missed sharing the experience with someone else. I missed the human connections, which I found in fellow campers like Angel and Andrew or Bailey and Lance. 

So with this travel element of my goals list comes the real important part of my Phase 3: the connections. I feel like as I became goal focused and too independent in the past two years I was wrestling too much with connections, with the people that mattered. That's the problem with being independent. There exists a spectrum of independence where one pole is truly being oneself and doing whatever one wants but the caveat comes with how to do this while not alienating the people that matter. 

My travel goals will remain, but my real purpose in Phase 3 is trying to find a life that isn't as high octane as the 40/44+ hour week plus school plus writing schedule. Now it's about the connections, about traveling with people and sharing my experiences with those I care about.

Make no mistake: I will still try to convince those I care about to go to the third world countries I want to visit. I mean who doesn't want to go to Iran?